Reality Check

This will be a short one, but I hope it’s thought-provoking.

When I was in my late teens and all the way through my 20’s I struggled with anorexia and body dysmorphia. When I looked in the mirror what was reflected back to me was not reality.

At 100-115 pounds, standing 5 feet 7 inches tall and wearing a clothing size around 0, I saw an overweight person looking back at me. My hips and thighs were very thick and wide, in my mind anyway.

I insisted that I was overweight and I needed to “do something about my legs!” I was convinced that what I saw in the mirror was TRUE. That it was REALITY. (It wasn’t until years later after being healed from this disorder, which is a form of mental illness, that I saw the truth. I didn’t even recognize myself in video and in pictures. I had NO IDEA how dangerously thin I was.)

I am so thankful that the people around me told me the truth. They made me see a doctor and a nutritionist. I had to do weigh ins. I had to go to counseling. And I was fortunate to be healed quite miraculously by God.

But, what if my loved ones didn’t have the courage to tell me the truth? What if they left me in my delusion? In my mental illness? What if they agreed with me, and said that I was heavy? That what I perceived, what I saw in the mirror, was actually MY reality simply because it’s what I believed? Where might I be today??

We need to be honest with one another. Not to shame someone but to help them. If what they see in themselves is NOT true. Is NOT reality. Is not biologically accurate. We must tell them to seek help so they can be free and live the life they were meant to live, in the healthy body they were meant to have.

I was not meant to starve myself into deadly thinness.

I was not meant to live a life of body dysmorphia; feeling like I was looking in a funhouse mirror every time I looked at myself.

It was so confusing. So stressful because I was like, “Can’t you see how heavy I am? Why does no one see what I see??” It seemed SO REAL. SO RIGHT.

But it wasn’t real and it wasn’t right. I was ill and I needed help.

I am forever grateful first to my husband for helping me see the truth. And I praise God that I no longer struggle with disordered eating, and when I look at myself I see what is truly there.

In this mixed up world we now live in, we need to be loving and courageous to tell those we care about the truth. It’s not shameful to want to help an obese person to lose weight any more than it is shameful to want to help a person like I was to gain weight. It is not shameful to help someone see the truth of their biological gender/sex. It is wrong to encourage others to stay in their delusions and live in confusion.

Love others enough to be honest. You just might save someone’s life.